The blog that never was

Greetings friends,
As you may have guessed from the title this is when I write about how lazy and crusty I am for failing at keeping a blog.
Actually, nobody wants to hear about that. This is a time where I want to publicly share what has been on my heart and mind as my time in Beijing winds down. It would be untrue if I didn't say that moving to another country to teach English for one year hasn't been one of if not the most difficult things I have ever done during the span of my life here on planet Earth. But I would continue to be untrue if I didn't say it has been one of the most rewarding, satisfying and eye-opening experiences as well.
I came to Beijing last September. I didn't know a single person in a city of more than 27 million, a bit daunting for a kid from East Tennessee. At first I thought I wouldn't be able to handle it. The schedule was bad, the kids were crazy and I was missing the clean air and mountains of home. But, I had so much love and support from friends, my wonderful family and God that it all came together.
While I may have failed miserably at keeping a blog and posting about my day-to-day life I don't think I failed in bringing light and love into my classes and the lives of students, friends, and co-workers. I don't think I failed. It was a risk coming to Beijing, and it was so worth it. More importantly, there really isn't a pass or fail for this life journey. Sometimes we do a fantastic job, sometimes we have a bad day, but we are always given grace that never ends and for that I am forever grateful.
My last day of teaching is August 22nd, and I have a ticket for Washington on August 30th. I am looking forward to the next leg of the journey while remaining mindful and present here, now.
China has taught me so much. There are so many things I am unsure how to put into words, when I try it just comes out as a laugh, a grunt and sometimes a groan. But, it has been so, so good.
My fellow teacher and good friend Josh would often share this, quote from Saint Augustine of Hippo.
“The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.”
Happy journeying my loves. See you on the other side.

The Process of Living

Hello friends! 大家好！
It has been too long since I posted and I wanted everyone to know that I am alive and well.
China has been in the news more than usual the last few months. From the terrible atrocity in Kunming, Yunnan to the mysterious disappearance of the flight from Malaysia to Beijing.
What I have been focusing on recently is the process of learning a language and the process of teaching a language.
When I think of a process I immediately imagine something that will take time, effort and at times a little bit of suffering. I am learning that everything is a process or has a process. Life is a process. Right?
Within the process of all things we have to develop and use patience. Otherwise, nothing will get done and we will be left with empty thoughts and farfetched plans.
Teaching English as a second language is something that requires a lot of this patience stuff, especially with the younger dudes. One can view each day as a process with specific factors and facets that all add up to one collective experience- or life.
Recently, I have observed my own growth and at times my own stagnation.
The process of teaching and learning go hand in hand. As I teach I learn more and more about the process of developing linguistic knowledge and expression in language. I have grown in my own second language acquisition and I have viewed the progress, with the concept of patience and the desire to learn quickly.
Teaching English as a second language to young Chinese students and now Korean adults has been a challenge but it has been wonderful.
Pushing boundaries and developing a way to communicate basic concepts is not always fun, but it is like anything else- a process which takes time, effort and energy.
As I teach and learn I am developing into the great mystery that is life and I hope that all of you reading are doing the same thing. I hope you are growing, dancing, singing and creating beauty. This is my hope for the planet and for humanity. While times may seem dim with countries invading; mass stabbings at a train station, airplanes disappearing, and the global economy crumbling upon the backs of the poor while the rich continue the process of gaining more power and currency.
However, in the process of life I think we can develop our view of the process and gain a larger perspective of our evolution and power of our own individual processes that occur daily. And I believe these processes are more significant than we can imagine. We have a beautiful task at hand.
It ain't all bad, friends.
Cheers to you, and I hope you enjoy and realize the magnificent process of your life.

Until next time!

Flying Without Wings

Sometimes I feel as if I have to fly, leave reality.
But there is no getting around all that is, and a guy named Rodriguez says, "nothing beats reality."
If you have ever felt like this I don't need to say anything else, perhaps hand you a pen and ask you to tell me about. But what if you didn't know what to do with a pen and a blank page? Have you ever looked up into the stars and had a shocking realization that you are looking at ghosts, long dead burning beautiful gas.
So, back to this reality thing.
Sometimes you can get away from it, or it can get away from you and then you realize you are trying to grasp for 'it'. And another shocking realization of it all- 'it' is always happening and it happened long before you realized it IS.
By this time I think you guessed what I am talking about.
They call 'it' God sometimes.
Sometimes in the right context.
Others... not so much.
At any rate, it's at this point that I am realizing the process of growing wings, and learning to fly before it all goes down in flames.
Also, I am listening to Counting Crows, 'Films About Ghosts' as I write.
OKay, done!
Cheers!

Small Things

“Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love.” ― Mother Teresa
Hello again my friends!
Here we are a few weeks into the New Year and I had some thoughts to share.
When I started to think about resolutions I wanted to pick something small that I knew I could stick with, and it was with this that I started to think about small things.
Small things are often overlooked and uncared for; small change, small decisions, tiny actions that are performed daily such as going to work, eating and putting on our shoes are often unconscious and 'small.'
Everyday we all have a chance to live out the above quote from Mamma T, "not all of us can do great things, but we can do small things with great love. We can do this with mindfulness.
As I think about the small things that I can do with great love I am overwhelmed.
I talk to a security guy at my building, it's a chance for me to practice my Chinese- but he really get's a kick out of talking to me. To be honest, some nights after I teach I don't want to talk- especially in Chinese. But if I practice what I preach I will be mindful of the moment and I will engage in the small things and love my friend.
As I teach and see the faces of children light up as they learn and practice a new language I must engage in the small moments with them and do it with great love.
As I smile at the curious faces that pass me by I must do it with great love.
This seems so small, so insignificant and meaningless.
It seems small, but we are small creatures in a very vast, ever expanding universe. However, we have a great power and I believe with my whole being that the power we harness is love.
I would like to offer a challenge to you if you are reading this.
Think of one way you can engage yourself in the arena of the daily life.
Do something small, do something that seems insignificant and pour your being into it.
Do it with great love, and watch it grow into a mighty thing.

Concrete Jungle

Well, here I am alive and well. A few months into this adventure and it feels like a warm afternoon after a cat nap.
I recently introduced my Chinese co-workers to the film 180 degrees south, if you haven't seen it I would advise it. I had seen the film several times but I was blown away by the concept of adventure- that is something that is in the mind as daring, full of the unknown and that something is then put into action. Action is the most important and potent ingredient to any adventure.
Yvon Chouinard says in the film, "The word adventure has gotten overused. For me, when everything goes wrong, that’s when adventure starts”. I pondered this for a minute. So when you are on the biggest road trip of your life and you get a flat tire and have to change it in the pouring rain at 4:00 AM this is actually when the adventure begins. Frustration may be the natural emotion but if you think- damn, what an adventure I believe Yvon's definition of adventure will overtake that negative aspect.
These days I am pretty busy with school, Chinese classes, learning a new culture, and how to operate in a big city. I would be a liar if I didn't confess that the mountains of Tennessee and North Carolina weren't in my heart everyday. But, if one isn't willing to allow a journey to happen it never will. The aspect of achievement isn't what I mean, I think it is the entire process that is an adventure. It is the miracle of existence. Pretty rad. I am reminded of the words of old Bilbo Baggins when speaking to Frodo before his biggest adventure. "It's dangerous business Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.”
Wisdom is all up in them words. I am learning that the city is different, to say the least. I am not akin to taking buses, subways, trains, and taxis. I can't put the sunroof down and blast reggae music- so I am making due...SIDENOTE: there is a Chinese reggae band you should check out,Long Shen Dao (Way of the Dragon). The thing I am most interested in about the people in Beijing is communication. There are literally people everywhere, all the time. But as I observe from a straw hat and a tie-dyed tee shirt (thanks Lauren Coakley) I notice that nobody is really talking or even looking for that matter. Iphones and Samsung tablets invade the human necessity to talk to one another. Headphones are in ears- the sounds and sights of this city can be ugly so maybe what is happening is an escape. At any rate, I am turning some heads and giving the biggest grins I can! I hope y'all are doing the same.
That's all I have for now...I will leave with another quote from Yvone. Peace friends! Love!

"Real adventure is defined best as a journey from which you may not come back alive, and certainly not as the same person."

Waiting On Bus 111

Either on a mountain in the Appalachians or standing at a smoogy bus stop in the center of Beijing my mind is clear and my aim is true.
I was thinking about stillness and experiencing that it can be found anywhere, but it doesn't come easily. I see a lot of fighting- competition and greed. This is evident in this world. Most plainly in the United States of America and in this Middle Kingdom.
I believe and hope that it will vanish in the blink of an eye.
Just as the river flows, everything changes. This is impermanence.
Have you ever doubted your path?
Have you ever doubted peace?
From time to time, I do too-
but that is why we are here.
We are here to remind one another of the connectedness of this task.
Get out of bed and give a hug-
turn off your iPhone and turn on a smile.
Come one and all
If you have love you will reach the station.
We will sit under the mango tree completely drunk on the wine of The Beloved.
Love of Thee.

So Much to Say

After watching 'Never Sorry' and learning about Ai WeiWei I typed a few pages out about freedom and what it means to me. I deleted it all and decided this was more in line with the truth of the topic. "A small act is worth a million thoughts." -Ai WeiWei
I originally had this titled, "8th of September".

Drinking coffee from the top of the building
smoking and listening to the commotion of the city.
The cat sleeps on the pillow and my clothes are across the bed,
asking to be put away in a separate drawer.
But the recycling needs to be taken out.
The sky is crying and our clothes need to be thrown in the wash.
Van Morrison speaks of warm love being ever-present, everywhere.
In Saṃsāra you have to watch with a clear mind and not be disturbed by the crazies.
Take a drink and continue the soft whisper of your soul catching fire-
again and again
because we could very well do the dishes but it is nice outside.
The fire truck shakes the house in the morning
and we kiss one another without lips
and we talk to one another without words
and we understand the cycles of the moon without ever needing to see it.
We make love on the couch and we use everything we have
until it is gone.